Caramel Pain

The silent pains of the body
never prepare their menus
but serve raw meat uncharted.
Caramel burned points of grief
get stuck between bones,
sticky sweet sickening drones.
Chants of discus plates chip fresh
green grass, leaving bare
earth bleeding.

24 thoughts on “Caramel Pain

  1. You have used sounds to great effect in these last two poems, David! The last was a whispering murmur. This is full of hard, guttural and explosive sounds that are very expressive of the emotions behind the poem. “Caramel burned point of grief”… “chants of discus plates chip fresh green grass, leaving bare earth bleeding.”

  2. Hey MB- I’m unaware of the sounds of the words, but usually notice it after I write, or when someone else points it out. I appreciate your views. David

  3. Mark- I’m gald you like it. Pain is vivid, but mute. I think most of us ignore pain as we age. We have to. I’ve started “listening” to its “language”.

    Thanks for stopping by.

  4. David, me too, most of the time! People sometimes comment on alliteration or rhyme in my poems, and often I was completely oblivious while writing. But I’m trying to become more conscious of it because it really can make a difference to the strength of writing. These were fun to read because of all the sounds!!

  5. As my life has been particularly trying (painful) these past few months, I relate to your words on a level that not even I can understand.

    Thank you Garnet David.

  6. Teri- I hope you are OK.

    I smiled at the last part of you comment. The vagueness of this poem is like pain, insidious and non-understandable.

  7. David, I find these sentences quite haunting:

    “The silent pains of the body
    never prepare their menus”

    I’m sure we all see what we want to see in poetry. In these two sentences I see the cry of those without a voice; I hear the anguish of abused children with nowhere to escape and too afraid to seek help; I see repressed and poor citizens trapped in poverty with no voice; I see AIDS devestating Africa and the West turning a blind eye.

    You have a gift my friend. In just a few words you bring to bear a power few can wield with language. Peace.

  8. Trée- Your comments are always so rich and meaningful (and sweet) you ARE a gift!

    Pain is something which is rarely ever discussed. whether the pain of abused children or untreated pain in hospitals. it makes no sound itself. And many who cry out are considered weak or desiring attention. No one can prove they are in pain.

  9. Having made friends with pain, as I do with other things, I really like your choice of caramel as a metaphor. It works so well for me. Thick and stick, something that I can’t get away from and yet . . . it’s a part of me . . . What am I when it’s not there? I’ve grown so used to it. I’ll miss it when it’s gone. There’s a bittersweet quality, light like the caramel color, sad like the nostalgia for candy apples from a childhood that was free.

    I cannot prove my pain. I can only hope and rely on those who care about me to believe in it. I can only rely and hope on my own ability to set it aside when they need me to.

    This is a beautiful poem, David. It packs so much meaning in so many words and it touched me deeply.


  10. Liz- Making “friends with pain” is an interesting phrase. It makes sense. Accepting pain and not fighting it is one way to help ease it. It seems backward, but I’ve found it works when there are no other options. Some people have found that meditation techniques and visualization help with chronic pain, like breathing into the pain or seeing it as a color and then changing it to something more appealing.

    When I was hospitalized with acute pancreatitis, an extremely painful affliction, I had to be moved to be given a CAT scan to see how I was healing. The pain I endured while being lifted and moved was beyond belief. The nurse kept telling me to breathe. I did that, but I also pictured the bright blue-green of the water around the Greek islands. That color soothed me.

  11. I’ve never heard of changing the color of pain. I’ll have to try that. It seems like something right up my alley. 🙂 Thank you for telling me about it. Blue-green like the water sounds beautiful, the reason sounds awfully painful.

  12. As I read and re-read this aloud, I marvel again at your gift for lassoing a time capsule of life in a unique multi-sensory fasion, particularly sound and kinesthetics. Caramel is utterly brilliant for colour and it’s tenacious qualities.

  13. Hi Silvermoon- It’s nice to see you around. I hope you are thriving and continuing to create beautiful paintings and poetry. Thank you for your comment.


  14. I like your allusion to ‘making friends with pain’….seemingly somewhat counterintuitive to be sure and yet we know from experience that the opposite tack can be more productive, thus the catch-phrase “What you resist, persists”. That is, the first and best approach is to accept the reality of what is and then deal with it accordingly, such as; take pain pills if necessarry! And if that’s not possible then not accepting the pain can only acerbate the problem. So, acceptance comes first, (make friends with it) then apply all the techniques one knows about and if nothing works what else is left but to ‘be with it’ until something changes.
    I realize that I have just repeated what you said above albeit in a different way. Oh, well. Suffice to say I loved it for all the reasons already alluded to by others and am hoping to read more from you soon.
    Your friend, Ron

  15. At times pain is all one has, making friends with it is the sensible thing to do- but awaiting it, seeking it or glorifying it would not be being vey kind to oneself.

    I write this merely as a reflection on the theme of pain and on one’s relationship to pain- not particularly in response to the post but to the discussion of pain which has followed.

    Take care David.

    ((( )))

  16. Ron- That was such a concise summary of the previous discussion. Of course we don’t want to ignore pain, but fighting it usually exacerbates it. Thanks for your clarity.

  17. Shankari- Hello friend. Your soft awareness is welcome. No pain is the goal. Passion and strain toward gain, but never too much pain.

    x, D

  18. Isn’t this what Fritz Perlz meant when he said, “lose your mind and come to your senses”? Maybe pain is an acute sensation modified by fear? I know some who seem to pain themselves just to get attention.

  19. Bradford- It’s a pleasure to have you visit and comment. You are obviously one who relishes the intricacies of truth, and your understanding runs deep.

    I do believe pain is amplified by our fear of it. How to tell someone this is another matter.

    I read a few posts on your blog. You wrote of how you project your own excitement at new ideas on to others who may not be receptive to them in the same way. This is the challenge of a great teacher, to make complex ideas accessible without compromising their depth.

    You are right on the mark noticing how people “create” pain for drama. It’s like brain surgery to point out the illusion of that which they feel is real.

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